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Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Contemplation of Ending My Blog

I took an unintended hiatus from my blog last week when my computer crashed...as I was in the middle of writing my last and final blog post that would be on “From Marriage To Motherhood”. I had decided that after nearly three years of typing away within my little space on the web, and covering several topics, that there really wasn’t too much else {besides my daily happenings} to write about.

Three years ago when I was engaged, this blog served the purpose of sharing my wedding ideas and documenting my excitement as I prepared to become a bride. A year later, I walked down the aisle, became a Mrs., and did many posts recapping our exquisite wedding day…and then shared details of our fabulous honeymoon to Prague and Vienna. And then in what seemed like three-point-five seconds, I was pregnant. It turned out that we brought back a permanent souvenir from our honeymoon {I still stand by this belief despite the Dr. saying that we actually conceived two weeks after our return}. In essence, I quickly went “From Marriage To Motherhood”. The most beautiful stages of my life welded together in just a short amount of time and this blog holds within it, all of those amazing moments and the feelings of those times.

I felt like there was a lot to write about in the first year of marriage and the first year of motherhood {I had intended to end this blog shortly after Ilah was born because I didn’t think that I would have the time to devote to it, but I am so glad that I continued}. So many topics came to mind and I loved having this blog as an outlet to express myself, whether it be through thought-provoking posts, or writing about random musings. But now…I feel as though you get the gist of how my life is – my days are pretty mundane. There is no wedding to plan, no honeymoon to be had, and no more pregnancy high’s {or low’s} to share. I started to feel that with the exception of the occasional exciting vacation plans, friends visiting from out of state, a fun birthday celebration, or enjoyable holiday festivities, that my blog was becoming dull, and therefore I wasn’t enjoying it anymore.

While many fellow mommy bloggers have expressed that they utilize their blog to primarily document their family life, that isn’t my sole - or even main – purpose here. As my readership has grown, so has my online community and I love connecting with you – yes, those who I don’t even know – and sharing common ground with fellow women. No matter the different places that we are at in our lives – whether we have similarities or not - I have wanted my blog to be a place that you stopped in, felt comfortable, and depending on the day, got a laugh, felt encouraged, or simply got a new recipe to try out. On the days that I have written posts from the heart, are the days in which the most comments {and private emails to me} have come in – and each of you are able offer up your own enlightening perspective that all of us can draw from. Trust me when I say that I gain a lot from your words, just as you do from mine.

Three paragraphs into typing out my good-bye post to you all, my computer died and could not be brought back to life {which is why I only had one post up last week}. I don’t want to read too much into it, but the timing of it all did make me question the correlation. And then, just days later, I received an extra long comment on my blog from a reader who “coincidently” just now left a comment on a post that I wrote many months ago. Last year, back in October of 2010, I did a post in which I asked you, my readers, “Why Do You Read My Blog?” All of the 44 answers that I received were so touching. I’m not sure if you could tell, but even back then, I was contemplating closing the virtual doors of my blog {I also relayed in that post why I blog}. It was all of the endearing comments from you that made me feel that perhaps I wasn’t ready to call it quits just yet. The most recent comment to that post came just last week, and it was that person’s words, along with the feedback that I have been getting from people close to me [with regard to me ending my blog], that caused me to pause and rethink if I wanted to permanently unplug from my tiny little space on the internet. I normally don’t put other people’s comments within a blog post, but in part, these are the words left within that comment:

“….please continue your blog and keep doing what you’re doing. If you ever get bored or lose faith or get too busy we’ll be there to cheer you on and let you know that you DO make a difference. Thank you for letting us all be a part of your life”….

Paige, it seems to me that your comment on a post that I wrote seven months ago was purposed to arrive to me just last week.

So…..

After some further thought….

I think this little ol’ blog of mine still has some stories to tell. Some life lessons to share. Some advice to give {and receive}. And some personal, relatable things to talk about.

I decided that I will sit down and make a list of topics that I will be turning into blog posts. They will be things that I will be sharing from the heart and will require me to be a bit vulnerable; but I feel that in choosing to continue to blog, that this online space needs to serve a greater purpose other than sharing my meal planning ideas and posting updated adorable pictures of Ilah. Aside from you coming here to see what I’m up to that week, I also want this blog to be a place of encouragement, honesty and authenticity. The comments {and moreover, the many emails} that I have received following a post in which I have been transparent, tells me that I need to do more of those posts for we all enter onto common ground when our imperfections are made visible - for that’s when we are truly able to bond as women….when we share our stories.

As long as I know this blog is serving a purpose, I will continue writing. And feel free to also let me know if there is a topic you would like for me to write about. I’m open to that! : )

In advance, I will tell you that there will be some days that I won’t be able to get around to writing and you may not see a new post on my blog for a day or two, or sometimes longer. I try to not have that lapse but sometimes it just can’t be prevented. But hopefully on the days that time does permit, I would love to do 2 posts {as I once did, pre-baby!}.

Whether you are someone who has been a reader since my pre-marriage days, someone who has been following along since my pregnancy, or you are a new reader who has just gotten acquainted with my blog - thank you from the bottom of my heart for growing with me and sharing in the joys of my life.

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