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Monday, March 21, 2011

LIFE’S COURSE – Purposed or Happenstance?

I noted in yesterdays post that my husband and I went to see the movie The Adjustment Bureau over the weekend. Without giving away too many details of the movie, I really started to reflect on its subject matter over the last few days. In essence, this movie asks the question: Do we control our destiny, or do unseen forces manipulate us {whether that be God, divine intervention from some sort of higher power, or maybe it’s just simple happenstance that propels us toward one direction over the other}? Furthermore, what comes from the "ripple effects" {doing or not doing certain things that have the potential to change the outcome of events in the near or distant future}?

Roger Ebert gave this movie a “three out of four” stars and wrote a review in which part he said, “The Adjustment Bureau is about the conflict between free will and predestination, and right there, you have the whole dilemma of life, don't you? Either it makes a difference what you choose to do, or the book had already been written, and all you can do is turn the pages”.

I started to think back on the choices that I have made thus far in my life.

How did I get to where I am today?

Was I following what I believe to have been God’s leading, thereby walking out a predestined plan for my life….or was I simply taking risks and chances and following my heart, thereby charting my own course? I think both. Indeed I could have done without some of the life experiences that I wound up saturating myself in, but had I not have gone through them, thereby avoiding them altogether, what side of life’s maze would I have come out on? What would have happened had I not veered from succumbing to my youthful hearts desires and chose to make choices with my heart rather than my sensible brain? I wonder how many times I have gone off course, only for God to put me back on the road that I was meant to be on. Oh how I am thankful for His covering.

Which brings me to….

Undoubtedly I believe there is a God. I believe that He can orchestrate wonderful things to happen in our lives. I believe that He grants us hope and favor and blesses us with prosperity and many good things throughout our lifetime. I believe that when we pray and seek Him, His spirit guides us towards right choices that bring us peace and fulfillment, no matter how long we have to wait….but I also believe that God gives us free will. We make our own choices – He doesn’t make them for us.

There are many days in which I am driving on the roads of Georgia and I think to myself, “How did I end up here!?”

Well…by airplane. DUH.

But I mean…had I not taken the leap of faith….had I been reluctant to move across the country….had I stayed complacent and never have dared myself to start new elsewhere, what would have happened? How would my life be different?

It’s mind boggling to think that inadvertently moving just one chip on your board of life – taking an action that you were unknowingly purposed to take – can align your course in life to bring about such goodness, such fulfillment, and land you right in the center of where you belong.

And while although relishing in such a blissful state of mind, wrapped around all the things that bring utter happiness, there’s the flip side. The side that causes you to question the dark things that happen in life. Why are those things purposed? Why did my father die? Why did his course in life end so abruptly? Did he make a choice somewhere along the way that changed the course of the life that he was meant to live, and it caused ripple effects? Or was it just simply his time? And if so, why was that specific time the purposed time? At just 40-something years young. Why was his wife meant to be a widow, and why was I purposed to be fatherless? Where is the sense in that? I can’t find it. I walk through life still believing in God, but yet {honestly} sometimes questioning His allowance of why He, who has all-encompassing power, allows certain things to happen. Especially to those who are His children.

If there were an option to know how each of my days on earth would unfold, I would decline. One might say that to know would enable them to make the most of their days and allow them to live life to its fullest. But as for me….I want to resume with the mystery of not knowing how my destiny will unfold. I want to continue to make choices, and marvel at where I find myself 5, 10, 15…65 years from now, as a result of them. I want to continue to trust in God, and trust in myself, and breathe the beauty of life in one day at a time, choosing the option to revel in the splendor of what each new day brings. Because after-all, doing just that…has gotten me here.

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